Hoşgeldiniz Ramadan

During the last ten or so days of this month I have so far seen many varying emotions of people out in this huge village of Istanbul.

Every evening at around 6.30pm as I leave my office to venture on to the street, I see people anxiously waiting in bumper to bumper traffic that is the daily curse of this area of Istanbul; known as Maslak. In the last week or so I have seen people drive up the wrong side of the road in order to try and get out of a traffic jam only to create another on the other side of the road with on coming traffic. I have seen people bumped from their scooters by careless drivers, pedestrians (including my good self) almost swiped or hit by a slow crawling manual vehicle trying to accelerate bit by bit up the hill; men and women curse and gesture to one another because of their driving skills, or lack thereof; people fighting over a taxi and taxi drivers refusing to drive people because they don't want to be stuck in the evening traffic! It is a stressful time.

Such is the Holy month of Ramadan.

During this month many Muslim's undertake one of the five pillars of Islam; fasting. This month is considered the most holy of the Islamic calendar. Those who choose to fast are expected to refrain from eating and drinking, among other things, from sunrise to sunset; people are expected to have purity of mind and actions and the act of fasting is said to redirect the heart away from worldly activities, with the purpose being to cleanse the inner soul and free it from harm.

Therefore, those who have kept their fast only have one thing on their starving minds; İftar- the evening meal to break their fast. İftar takes place, these days, around 7.35pm, and becomes earlier as the days move through the month. People rush home from their jobs to cook the evening meal and have it ready on the table in time. No city has the same timing when it comes to breaking the fast as the timing is based on the sun and its movement. People listen for the ezan, or the evening call to prayer, which in the evening also signifies the correct timing for breaking the fast.

In the last week we have had some delicious meals of fish (fried, but oh so tasty!), köfte, sauteed lamb, lots of lentil soup, and tasty salads and of course the traditional Ramazan pide which is made specially in this month as well as buying lots of huge fresh dates from the market at Eminönü, and also the specialty dessert of Güllaç, a milky pastry dessert served with fresh pomegranate pieces and chopped pistachio nuts. It is a light and tasty dessert that doesn't make you feel overloaded after a meal.

The word 'iftar' in the dictionary is directly translated as "the breaking of the Ramadan fast at sunset", and is purely for those who are fasting during this month. People still participate in having "iftar" even though they haven't fasted a day in the month and people take time to catch up with friends and family for meals during this time.

Surprisingly, studies have shown that some populations actually gain weight during this month which is not surprising given the amount eaten in the evening and then throughout the night when the body is at its least active.

In any event, I really enjoy this month. Food is the focus of the day and cooking it together with family and friends and sharing the meal together is the highlight and something so looked forward to by those who have undertaken the fast.

Surprise trip home

My sister with M and L

I made a last minute surprise trip back to Melbourne on 16 August. I had told mum and some other people that I would be in town, but I didn't tell my sis. I figured if anyone could do with some excitement and happiness in their day, it would be her! I told her I was going to London for work so she didn't suspect anything different.

So there she stood at my mum's front door on Saturday 16th August with M and L. All of them were shocked, especially K who said "how come I didn't know about this?", "I know everything". Well not this time! It was so great to surprise her. She cried and I'm sure was pleased with the surprise I had pulled off.

Although the trip was quick it was nice to have the chance to spend some quality time with her and my mum. Although I saw them at the wedding in April, not much time was spent sitting around and really catching up propers over a cup of tea. April was rushed, full of time restraints and Ken and I both wanted to enable people to do and see everything they wanted in this great city. So we spent much of our time making sure people were happy and ensuring they got to see all that Istanbul has to offer.

This trip was also nice for me to see some people who have been amazing friends to me since I left Australia in 2005. Friends tend to drop off a bit once you leave and keeping in touch becomes harder for some which is normal. That said, there have been a select few who have really kept in touch and always made an effort which has enabled those friendships to flourish and become things of great value to me.

My sister and I had some lovely time together. We went to Italy I for dinner shortly after I arrived and also had a great dinner at Trunk. I had been dying to go there since it opened to see the work B had done on the place. B brother is one of the owners and while I worked for Liquid Lines last year, the work on the restaurant had just started so it was nice to see the final product. We ate lovely food and then went off to see a movie; The Visitor. Great film so if you haven't seen it, I definitely recommend it.

I had some great times with the kids too. I went to watch them at their swimming class on a Sunday and it was great to see M's improvement since I last watched him. L is like a fish and loves the water and is less fearful than M at the same age.

B with M and L at swimming

I also had the chance to go to their Montessori school and see them at work. M really enjoys geography and made some flags from different countries and then learnt the countries by heart from recognising the flags. He even made a Turkish flag!

Off to school

I managed to squeeze in a dinner at Dumpling King, my old fave with some old work friends which was great. They had surprisingly arranged for a birthday cake and lovely gift for my 30th which was the week before. I miss the ease of eating out in Melbourne where you can head to Box Hill for Chinese, Victoria Street for Vietnamese, Lygon Street for Italian and Sydney Road for middle eastern!

All in all it was a great trip home, even if tiring and a long flight (17 hours!) I look forward to doing more trips like that in the future and of course for our next trip in January for our Austrlian wedding celebration!! It will be nice to enjoy the warm weather in Melbourne while it will be freezing in Istanbul. Melbourne was really cold this time around and you can never imagine how cold it is somewhere else when you are in the grips of summer!!

Mum and me

Me and my mates!

The price of fish

On a recent supermarket trip, I was amazed with the price of fish. Kenan said that the prices were so good because most people are out of Istanbul and not shopping and in order to move stock, they reduce the prices. I was thoroughly impressed and we purchased a load of fish for the freezer for the coming weeks.

İstavrit, small fish, 4.90YTL per kilo

Salmon cutlets 9.90YTL per kilo
Large whole salmon from Norway, 8.90YTL per kilo


Çıpra per piece 1.35YTL. Süper bargain!!

Other bargains to be had were on karpuz (watermelon) and yeşil zeytin (green olives). Check out those prices!

Still though, the price of rice milk or soy milk is so outrageous that I just don't buy it! 8.40YTL!!

I wonder if you can still get bargains in Australia? I know generally that prices there have risen for the basic necessities, but what about things like fish and meat, I wonder. It will be interesting to see when I am back there in January.

The differences between here and there...

There are many differences from life here and life in Australia.

I had an interesting conversation with a friend/colleague yesterday which shed some light one on particular difference.

I find it interesting that as people age in this country many are drawn to their grandchildren and children and often move or live closer, if not in the same home with them. Many care for their grandchildren while their children work in order to earn money an set up their lives and this is considered quite the norm. This is also a very similar practice in Greece where I know the same is done.

In Australia however, I feel the attitude on this issue is different. My view is that parents see their work as "done" once they have raised their kids and they have left the house and when their own children are having children for themselves and parents feel it is a time when they want to enjoy their retirement years by moving warmer climates, travelling, taking a cruise or involving themselves in more social events with friends their own age. Independence is another word that comes to my mind whereby the older they get, the more independent they wish to be, or continue to maintain their independence in their older years. Rarely do parents move into their children's homes; they more commonly move to retirement homes or supported accommodation where they remain independent but have the help nearby if needed.

I remember when my grandmother told my father that she was ready to move from her home where she had lived for more than 50 years. My father offered for her to come and live at our house where we could build an extension to accommodate her in her own independent setting. She was against it. My father looked at houses/villas closer to our home so we could be geographically closer to her. She didn't want that either. So in the end she found a lovely retirement village where she had her own home and small garden, but there were strategies in place if she became ill or required urgent help. All at the ripe age of 88.

My grandmother, bless her, was a fiercely independent woman who had raised two teenage boys on her own after her husband died at age 40. She lived for the next 52 years as single woman who did everything for herself. She delivered meals through the "Meals on Wheels" program to other elderly people by car each week for many, many years. Independence was so very important to her.

In Turkey, it is considered somewhat shameful to have your parents live in a nursing/retirement home. My friend explained to me that for many Turkish parents they almost expect that their children should and will take care of them in their older years just as they did when their children were young.

Culturally in Turkey, families operate as a unit which more than often includes parents and grandparents and kids and grand kids as one. In Australia, it's quite the opposite as parents make decisions separate from their children and grandchildren and live more independently of them and vice versa.

My friend told me a story of an elderly Turkish woman who lived in Kadıköy on her own. She would call on the local bakkal for help with buying the basics like milk and bread and would call on other to buy fish for her from time to time. She was independent, but alone. She had no family around her and one day after no one seeing her for some time, the neighbours broke into her house and found her dead. She had been dead at least a week, rodents had come and it was not a pretty situation.

People were outraged that this woman died alone and no one knew. They couldn't understand where her family was and how she could have died alone in that way. Unfortunately, this happens in Australia and other western countries. I have read many stories in the news of elderly people passing away in their homes and not been discovered until neighbours smell something odd.

Turkish home life involves neighbours and friends and family. Everyone is very intertwined. Everyone knows whats going on with each others children and husbands, who is having the next baby, who is getting married and what you cooked for dinner last night. Turks are social and communal and share everything.

Things are not so well known about your neighbours and those around you in Australia, unless like my family, they have lived next to their neighbours for some 25 years. People tend to be more private with matters. Questions that involve how much you earn, how much rent you pay and when are you having your first child are hardly ever asked, even if by close friends and family. In Turkey though, as I have learnt, such questions are par for the course.

I read a great article in Today's Zaman yesterday on entitled Surprising for foreigners? Normal for Turks.... This article covers some of the differences that we foreigners notice on a daily basis and learn to adapt to over time. Have a read of the article. It's interesting.

The other homeland, Nauru

My mother was born on worlds smallest island nation, the Republic of Nauru. Her mother was Nauruan and her father Chinese. Nauru lies 42km south of the Equator and has a continual tropical climate in the 30's with almost 100% humidity. The island is covered in palms trees and the local people speak Nauruan and or English. Nauru is populated with Micronesian and Polynesian people.

Nauru was designated a colony by Germany in the 19th century and following World War I it became a mandate territory administered by Australia, New Zealand and the United Kingdom. The island was occupied by Japan in World War II and in 1968 the island gained independence.

Nauru is unlike any place I know. It is an island which covers a tiny 21 kms sq. According to Wiki it is the smallest independent republic, and the only republican state in the world without an official capital. It is unique place with a population of around 10,000 and there are many weird and strange facts which I have learnt about the place. Some of them are:

• Nauruans are among the most obese people in the world with 90% of adults being overweight.




• Nauru has the highest level of type 2 diabetes in the world, with more than 40% of the population suffering from the disease.

• Nauruans love Aussie rules football and play it on dirt not grass.




• Weightlifting is a popular sport. Marcus Stephen (the current serving President) won seven gold and five silver medals in the sport at various Commonwealth Games.




• The official currency of Nauru is the Australian $.




• There is only one sealed road that circumnavigates the island.




• Nearest neighbouring island is some 300km east of Nauru.




• The island is surrounded by a coral reef which makes surfing almost impossible!

Nauru is basically built upon phosphate, in other words, bird poop. Nauru celebrated its richness for many, many years through its export in phosphate after masses were discovered in the 1900's. It was also described as 'paradise' by many. Not only was it rich financially, but its culture was rich and unique for the tiny island nation. In the early years, locals would eat from the land and fish the sea with large supplies of banana, pandanus, coconut and fresh fish. Life was easy as the profits of phosphate exports filled the pockets of its people. For example, in 1989 Nauru had the highest GDP per capita in the world.

I remember visiting as a child and loving the close ties our family had; being spoilt rotten by aunties and uncles; going fishing and eating fresh raw fish off the back of the boat with my Uncle Jack and playing with my cousins in the backyard which was the beach; with the sand and the water only footsteps from the door. I would watch as my male cousins would smash fresh coconuts over the back of a chair and we would drink the juice and then eat the white flesh within. There was always someone around to play with and I remember riding the back of my cousin Jonny's motor bike without a care in the world. Those were the days.

Over the years however, the country and its people have suffered. Today there remains little, if any exportable phosphate and the country teeters on the brink of financial ruin. Economic mismanagement forced the Nauruan Government to sell off their foreign property portfolio and they were forced to vacate Nauru House in Collins Street, Melbourne. Further problems came after failing to pay rent on their national air craft, Air Nauru, which was rented from Qantas. The airline was often grounded and people would be left stranded not able to travel back and forth. People often required urgent medical treatment in Australia due to diabetes or other related illnesses and it was always difficult to know when the plane would be returning.

Many people remember Nauru after it was swept into the spotlight back in 2001 when 439 Afghani refugees were rescued from a dodgy fishing vessel in international waters by the Norwegian Cargo Ship, MV Tampa. The fishing vessel was trying to make its way to Christmas Island at the time when it ran into trouble. At the time, a major dispute arose as the Australian government sought to prevent the ship from entering Australian waters, however the ship carried millions of dollars in cargo due to be delivered to Australia. Instead, after much debate, the Afghani's ended up being the product of the so-called "Pacific Solution" that was implemented by the Howard Government whereby the asylum seekers would remain on Nauru while their applications for asylum status was processed in Australia. Unfortunately for many, this took many years.

Although Nauru is facing tough times and has often been reported in the media in a negative way, the fond memories I have of the place will never change. I hope that in the future I can visit there with my mum and sister and see relatives and cousins and the new ones we have never met.

I was humbled today to find this site CARE4NAURU. I was amazed to find that Carey Baptist Grammar School in Melbourne have been sending teachers and students to Nauru since 2002 to help the local people during their June school holidays. The students pay their own way and spend their holidays teaching instruments and restoring churches on the island. I was so very touched. I had no idea they did this. Funnily, Carey is the sister school of my high school, Strathcona.

As a sign of our appreciation for their efforts, my sister and I both made donations to CARE4NAURU and I hope they can continue their amazing work on Nauru in the years to come.

Dreaming

I am desperately dreaming of a holiday. Everyone in the office is beginning to take off to places like Bodrum, Antalya, Fethiye and Kaş. In the last two weeks, I have arranged two separate weekend trips to Bodrum for my boss. He is going again today. I'm jealous.


My time will come, I know. I am planning a week off in mid-August. We are not sure where we are heading yet, and to be honest, I don't care as I am desperate to be able to sleep in, relax and have afternoon siestas.


My title page picture is of the kind of house I am dreaming about owing one day, or even renting for a summer one year when my sister and kids come to visit. Actually, this is a picture of a house that is for sale in Bodrum. Only 175,000 YTL, not bad I think. Well, that is compared to prices for holiday homes in Victoria; Sorrento, Portsea etc.


I'll keep dreaming....

Wedding memories

My gorgeous sister has posted some great videos she captured from my Turkish wedding back in April this year.

I would love to share those with you, so feel free to check them out at her blog G.R.Y.B at Home.

There are some great scenes of the dancing bride and groom as well as the drive to the wedding which had my heart racing! Brings back loads of happy memories and lots of laughs.

Enjoy!

Happiness and football

I'm no football fanatic but it really was great news to hear that Galatasaray has signed Australian Harry Kewell this week to play with the club for the next three years. Hopefully this season I can get to a game to see him play as he is my all time favourite Australian player (and may I say very cute too).

July 4

I was invited to my first July 4 party last night. It was held in Ulus, over looking Ulus park. The views from the top floor apartment were the most spectacular I have seen yet of Istanbul. It was a great party with all the 'American' trimmings; cup cakes that made up the US flag, a BBQ, hamburgers and beer, plus lots of other Turkish touches.

The party was held by a friend of a friend who I had actually met at another function a while ago with other Ameican ex-pats. It was a great night all round.

Turkish Banking

Today I was pushed over the edge.

Two weeks ago my work set up another Turkish Lira account for tax and social security ('SSK')payment purposes. Fine with me. But when I checked the accounts, the smaller amount for the SSK was deposited into my current account the the larger balance of my salary was deposited into the new account. Sounds like nothing. But when I went to the ATM the new account has not been linked to the ATM or anything so I can't access it.

I remembered that the old account has next to nothing in it so I need funds from the other account and in order to do that I need to link the two accounts so I can see them at the hole in the wall. Going to the bank here at lunch time is a painful process that I cannot take part in.

So, I thought to go online and transfer the balance from the old account into the new account; but I wasn't sure if it would move over in a day. So, I type in my account details and hit 'go' but nothing happens. I repeat this process over and over; shut down the internet browsers and then try again but still nothing.

I pick up the phone and dial the bank and select '9' for English. There I wait. And I wait. Listening to the voice saying "all our representatives are busy now, please stay on the line". Yeah right. Busy eating breakfast and sipping tea.

A few minutes later I am connected. I explain my problem and the woman on the end of the phone asks for my account ID. I provide it, to which she replies "there is no customer number like this". To which I offer "I'll give you my card number then". I read out the number and the she asks for my full name. I give it. Then she asks for my date of birth. I give it. Then she asks for my fathers name. I give it. Then she asks for my mothers maiden name. I give it. Then she asks for my passport number. I give it. Thinking surely this was more than enough info to verify that I am in fact me, she goes on to ask my home address in Turkey. I tell her the address and I stop after saying the area name. Then she asks "Mrs. M, what district please". WTF.

Surely, by now I have given more than enough personal identification information for security purposes to not warrant anymore questions. This was bordering upon ridiculous, stupid and insulting. Then she asks me "do you have a mobile number". I think to myself, well, daaahh, you can see it on your frickin' screen in front of you can't you???? So I repeat the number to her and she says she will now call my mobile phone. "Hmm, what? Excuse me? For what", I say? "For security procedure Mrs. M". I laughed and said to her "Goodness, don't you think you have enough information already"?

So my mobes rings and I pick up. She asks me "Mrs M who are you speaking on the other telephone? "Finansbank", I say. "About what matter are you talking Mrs. M", she says.."INTERNET BANKINGGGG" I say.

So she hangs up from my mobile and then we talk on the other line. She sorts out the problem with the internet customer number and I set up a PIN number again. (However, still now the internet account access doesn't work!) She then asks me if she can help me with something else, to which I request help from her to link the two accounts I have. "Certainly Mrs. M, I can assist you". With that, the line goes dead and the screen on my phone shows me that the call ended.

To say the least. My blood was boiling and my temperature was rising with frustration and aggravation. How the frick can the call just be cut off?

I picked up the phone and dialled the same number. Was told the same message "all our representatives are busy now, please stay on the line"......and waited.

A man answered the phone this time around. I told him that I had been speaking to someone and had been disconnected. I explained that I wanted to link my two accounts and he said "Certainly, I can help you". I gave him my card number and he was checking my account. Then. The line went dead. Cut off. Finished. Hung up. WTF? AGAIN?

Maybe on my account the previous customer service idiot put up a 'bitch flag' so the next customer service person could hang up on me also.

So I slammed the phone down and screeched something like "these people are so damn incompetent" and fled to the bathroom in tears. I think my boss heard me. But I don't care.

I just can't handle this incompetent and difficult service I seem to get with them. This is not the first time the line has been 'disconnected' when I have been needing help. I hate to go to the bank as no one speaks English, although their website claims they are so expat friendly and have English speaking customer service agents blah, blah, blah....

What is it about this place that some things just become so damn hard to do that you almost don't want to participate in it. I would be more than happy to take all my cash from the bank and keep it at home and never have to deal with a bank, ever.